Showbusiness

by Frank M. Roberts

April 2016

Irving Berlin wrote the song that told us, "There's No Business Like Showbusiness" and, speaking as a minor player for about 60 years, I must agree. There are no two days alike, there is little that is 'routine' in your daily life and, once you are involved, you have no intention of doing anything else.

With all that in mind, I gathered some showbiz tidbits that I hope will interest and/or fascinate you - mostly about people you know, especially if you have some years behind you.

Remember the English lad who captured American hearts - Roddy McDowell, whose star continued shining into adulthood - witness his major role in "The Poseidon Adventure." But, take a look at his younger years when he co-starred with the animals. He worked with "My Friend Flicka," and Lassie: "I really liked Lassie but, that horse was awful." He described the 'neigher' 'neigh-gat-tively. "Flicka was a nasty animal with a terrible disposition. All six of them were awful." Yeah, but that paycheck was pretty good.

Remember Mamie Van Doren - one of those blonde bombshells from several decades ago? Said she, "I married a few people I shouldn't have,but haven't we all?" Read that aloud to your spouse.

"King's Row" was the breakthrough movie for a future president and, it was recently shown on TCM. Ronald Reagan once said of himself: "I'm not smart enough to like." His son, a political columnist, has been writing about a politican he does not care for. His initials are 'DT'. Speaking of politicos, Pres. Nixon once summed up Pres. Nixon when he said, "I'm not a lovable man." No comment.

Red Skelton de-humbled himself automotively. He owned, at the same time, eight Rolls Royce cars. Speaking of cars, the very funny-man Henny Youngman said, "I got arrested in Beverly Hills. Why? I was driving an American car."

Howard Hughes was an eccentric genius who, in 1938, designed a plane which he and his crew flew around the world. The aircraft was so remarkable - the Japanese stole the design. It became the famed Zero of WW2. The engineering genius, once head knocker ('scuse the expression) of RKO invented the uplift bra for the Jane Russell breakthru movie, "The Outlaw." He explained, "it was very simple. Just an application of basic engineering principles." Men of the world suddenly showed an interest in - er - engineering principles.

Before he became a movie star, Cary Grant was a vaudeville star - as a stilt walker.

Even when the connection between cancer and cancer sticks was well known, John Wayne inhaled five packs of Camels, daily. Bogart was a slacker - five packs of Chesterfield's daily. Different brands, same disastrous results. The Duke later made public service announcements denouncing ciggies. Too late for him. Speaking of Big John - the story of Russian Premier Nikita Khrushev visiting Hollywood. He invited Wayne to visit Russia. His reply? "I wouldn't go to that goddamn Commie country."

A wealthy s.o.b. used car dealer romanced Elizabeth Taylor, between the star's romances with Richard Burton. The latter visited the actress whilst she was - er - being visited by Henri Winberg. Whoops - she hid him in a closet when the Brit star came a-visiting.

Hate to burst your bubbles, kiddies, but - Autry was a drinker. He wasn't hypocritical about it, one time declaring, "no one ever saw me drinking martinis out of a teacup like Roy Rogers." One time, Gene and his driver were arrested for drunk driving. He shoulda stayed, "Back In the Saddle Again." Speaking of drinkers, George Gobel never went onstage without a drink or three. Another drinker? Miss Funicello, according to drink buddy, author James Bacon. Still on that subject - when Errol Flynn died he was 50, with the organs of an 80-year--old.

Mario Lanza was built like a bull. He even used to work out with heavyweight champ, Rocky Marciano. The actor-singer's orchestra leader was Frankie's cousin - Ray Sinatra whose son, Ray Jr., was a friend in our growing up years. My favorite story about dear ole dad concerned a request from a Vegas showman to work for him. He wanted to put his last name in biig letters, his first name in smaal letters. Ray Sr., a man of principle wouldn't buy.

Here's a fuzzy puppy note, courtesy Jim Bacon who remembered the time Pres. Eisenhower asked him to get an autographed picture of the Lennon Sisters, explaining, that it was a favor for Mamie and himself, noting, "we love that little one. She's as cute as a bug's ear." That would be the bug-eared Janet. Speaking of that family, the Lennon Brothers used to have a breakfast show in Branson - a good one, too.

You have to be a knowledgeable '40s movie fan to appreciate this name confusion story about actors Robert Preston and Preston Foster, plus other movie folk - all of whom worked for Paramount: The actors worked together in a movie and, whenever someone yelled, "hey, Pres," they both answered. So, some practical joker put out this memo about the studio going into production, "with a film starring Robert Preston, Preston Foster, and Susanna Foster, to be written and directed by Preston Sturges, with additional dialogue by Lewis Foster, and music by Stephen Foster."

I never knew Dorothy Lamour (what??) but my Uncle Lewis, a Baltimore attorney, did. Someone found a note about her first audition, in the 1930s. It read: Name: Mary Leta Lambour; Description: Brunette, slender, fairly good looking. Talent: Auditioned as a singer. Remarks: Not recommended. Bad style as a singer. Didn't even try as an actress. Doubtful prospect. Oh-h -- those so-called experts.

How to make a movie - lesson one: In 1926, Cecil B. DeMille was about to film his first version of "The Ten Commandments." Every staff member was given a copy of the Bible and ordered to memorize every word of the Gospels. They were called in every day for a Bible lesson. There were exemptions - the 1,500 assorted animals including the reptiles. The human cast was huuge - 3,000 extras; And, this warm story that took place during the filming of DeMille's "The Greatest Show On Earth." A female aerialst brought her 4-year-old son with her each day. She had fallen once and was seriously hurt. A Milwaukee Journal writer noted that every time she goes on, the two go to the tent entrance where they embrace and say goodbye. The youngster doesn't watch his mother in action, but he listens to the music that signals the end of her scene, then comes running and leaves in momma's arms as she leaves the tent.

Work on this, then I'll quit for the day: The sheikh liked to get up early. He left a call for seven in the morning.