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*
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THAT REAL OLD TIME RELIGION
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THE ENTIRELY ARBITRARY CATEGORIES OF THE VERSES
ASATRU AND ODINISM:..................................Pg.2317
BRUJA:...............................................Pg.2317
BUDDHISM:............................................Pg.2318
CARGO CULT:..........................................Pg.2318
CHRISTIAN:...........................................Pg.2318
CLASSICAL PAGANISM:..................................Pg.2319
CONFUCIANISM.........................................Pg.2321
CTHULHU: (a fictional deity, but well-known).........Pg.2321
(THE ALMIGHTY) DOLLAR................................Pg.2322
DISCORDIANISM:.......................................Pg.2321
DRUIDS:..............................................Pg.2322
EGYPTIAN:............................................Pg.2322
FICTIONAL GODS, DEMONS AMD HEROES:...................Pg.2323
HINDU:...............................................Pg.2323
ISLAMIC:.............................................Pg.2323
JEWISH:..............................................Pg.2324
KAHBAHLA:............................................Pg.2324
KRISHNA:.............................................Pg.2324
MIDDLE EASTERN PAGAN:................................Pg.2324
MITHRAISM:...........................................Pg.2325
MOONIES:.............................................Pg.2325
NEW AGE:.............................................Pg.2325
NEW WORLD PAGAN:.....................................Pg.2325
SCIENTOLOGY:.........................................Pg.2326
SHINTO:..............................................Pg.2326
THELEMA:.............................................Pg.2326
VOODOO:..............................................Pg.2326
WICCA AND GENERAL NEO-PAGAN:.........................Pg.2327
ZARATHUSTRIAN:.......................................Pg.2328
UNCLASSIFIABLE VERSES AND UNKNOWN GHODS..............Pg.2328
NEW VERSES NOT YET CLASSIFIED:.......................Pg.2328
2319
*
THE REAL OLD TIME RELIGION
tune: "Old Time Religion"
(Chorus): Give me that real old time religion (3X)
It's good enough for me!
ASATRU AND ODINISM:
I hear Valkyries a-comin One-eyed Odin we will follow
In the air their song is comin And in fighting we will wallow
They forgot the words! They're hummin! Till we wind up in Valhallow
But they're good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
We will drive up to Valhalla It was good enough for Odin
Riding Beetles, not Impalas Though the tremblin' got forbodin'
Singing "Deutschland Uber Alles" Then the giants finally strode in,
And that's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Loki Shall we sing a verse for Thor,
It was good enough for Loki Though he leaves the maidens sore?
He thinks Thor's a little hokey They always come back for more,
And that's good enough for me! So he's good enough for me!
Shall we sing in praise of Loki, It was good for Thor and Odin
Though he left poor Midgard smokey? It was good for Thor and Odin
Oh, his sense of humor's hokey, Grab an axe and get your woad on!
But he's good enough for me! and it's good enough for me!
All the Gods tore into Loki We will worship now with vigor
Saying Deicide is hokey! The goddess known as Frigga
And they threw him in the pokey! Tho there are some who don't dig her
And that's good enough for me! She is good enough for me!
Good old Thor's the god of thunder If you wanna worship Odin
Really helps us get our plunder You don't have to have a coat on
Tho his head's still truly dunder Grab a sword and slap some woad on
He is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
In the halls of Frey and Freyja We will sing a verse for Loki
All the priestesses will lay ya He's the old Norse god of Chaos
If you're good enough, they'll pay ya! Which is why this verse don't
And that's good enough for me! rhyme or scan or nothin'
But it's good enough for me...
BRUJA:
Let us sing for Brujaria
Though the blood's a lot less cleaner;
It's not Christian Santaria
So it's good enough for me!
2320
BUDDHISM:
We will all go to Nirvana Oh we all will follow Buddah
So be sure to mind your manners Oh we all will follow Buddah
Make a left turn at Savannah And we'll eat no food but Gouda
And we'll see the Promised Land! Which is Gouda-nuff for me!
It was good enough for Buddha, We will go and sing "Hosanna"
As a god he's kinda cute-a, To our good ol' pal, Gautama,
And he comes in brass or pewta' He will never flim or flam ya',
So he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
No one wrote a verse for Buddah We will all go to Nirvana
Tho I think they really coulda We will all go to Nirvana
And I really think they shoulda Make a left turn at Urbana
'Cause he's good enough for me! And you'll see the Promised Land!
CARGO CULT & PACIFIC ISLANDS:
To the tune of Handel's "Largo" If you get too tired
We will hymn the gods of Cargo And you need to get up higher
'Til they slap on an embargo Just have Pele light your fire!
And that's good enough for me! From her island in the sea!
You can keep your saints with halos,
Your hosannas or dayenus:
Let's throw virgins in volcanos!
And that's good enough for me!
CHRISTIAN:
We will worship with the Fundies There are those who worship Satan
With their itchy hair-shirt undies And are just anticipatin'
If they don't bring "Mrs. Grundy," Armageddon's conflagratin'
Then it's good enough for me! That ain't good enough for me!
It was good for old Jehovah Let's all listen up to Jesus
He had a son who was a nova! He says rich folks like old Croesus
Hey there, Mithras! Move on ova'! Will be damned until Hell freezes
Another resurrection Day! And that don't sound good to me!
Jerry Falwell thinks he's sav-ed Oh we'll all be Fundamental
In a lamb's blood he's been lav-ed And be Holy Testamental
And HE thinks that I'M deprav-ed And never Trancendental
But that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
That Bob Larson shrieks and hollers We will finally pray to Jesus
Fighting demons in his callers From our sins we hope he frees us
Save his program: SEND YOUR DOLLARS! Eternal life he guarantees us
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Tho J.C.'s into fish, too, Anytime that I start hearin'
He's an avatar of Vishnu "Jesus loves you" I start leerin'
So he is welcome here, too, Maybe so, but not like Brian *
And that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
2321
Brother Jerry is a cretin Brother Oral's in his tower,
But with all the cash he's gettin' Trusting in the Lord's power
Lotsa folks'll be forgettin Getting richer by the hour,
It's the "Land of the Free!" Now he's got the ransom fee!
Brother Robert's church is Crystal Brother Earnest is a healer
But all the Bible that he's missed'll And not QUITE a wheeler-dealer --
Make you "hotter than a pistol" More a jumper and a squealer
But he's good enough for me! So he's good enough for me!
Brother Jim and Sister Tammy Then there's good ol' Brother Billy
Had a show that was a whammy Bringing souls in willy-nilly.
But now they are in Miami All his trips are kinda silly,
Tryin' t'get back on TV! But he's good enough for me!
Whether Low Church or it's High Church And the Romans said of Jesus
Or it's Pie-Up-In-The-Sky Church "Lets kill him, he don't please us"
Come on down and visit my Church "But the Atheists will tease us"
'Cause it's good enough for me! And thats good enough for me
You could join Jehovah's Witness And let's not forget Pelagius
Running door to door for fitness Though some call him outrageous
Well if you've been blessed with quickness, He is pious and courageous
Then thats good enough for me And he's good enough for me!
CLASSICAL PAGANISM:
We will go to worship Zeus You can dance and wave the thyrsos
Though his morals are quite loose And sing lots of rowdy verses
He gave Leda quite a goose Till the neighbors holler curses,
And he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will pray to Father Zeus We will sing for great Diana
In his temple we'll hang loose Who will teach of love and honor
Eating roast beef au jus, But you really gotta wanna!
And that's good enough for me! 'Cause she's tough enough for me!
Shall we sing a verse for Venus, We went off to worship Venus
Of the Gods she is the meanest, By the Gods! You should have seen us!
Cause she bit me on my...elbow! Now the Clinic has to screen us...
And it's good enough for me! But that's good enough for me!
We will venerate old Bacchus It was good enough for Sappho
Drinking beer and eating tacos With her lady on her lap-o
Til you've tried it please don't knock us She put Lesbos on the map-o
'Cause it's good enough for me! With her pagan poetry!
Let us raise a toast to Bacchus, When we worship Bacchus
We will raise a royal ruckus, The ethanol will sock us
Then we'll lay us down and f**k us We'll all get good and raucous
That's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Diana is a little spikey We'll sing praises to Apollo;
And she is a little dyke-ey Where the Sun God leads we'll follow
You don't have to be a Psych-e ('Though his head's a little hollow)
To know that's right for me! He's good enough for me!
2322
We will worship with Poseidon Don't neglect that shrine of Zeus'
We will meet him when the tide's in Tho he's lost his vital juices
All the maidens he will ride in The old boy still has his uses
Then he'll give 'em all to me! And he's good enough for me!
All the hunters start convergin' We will all bow to Hephaestus
When Diana is emergin' As a blacksmith he will test us
It's too bad she's still a virgin 'Cause his balls are pure asbestos
But there's still hope left for me! So he's good enough for me!
And what about this Bacchus, There is room enough in Hades
Who lives just to raise a ruckus? For lots of criminals and shadies
Loosens women so they'll f**k us, And disreputable ladies,
Well, that's good enough for me! And they're good enough for me!
We will all see Aphrodite And to help things get real racous
Though she's pretty wild and flighty The priests of Pan and Bacchus
She will meet us in her nightie Will hold a f***ing contest!
And she's good enough for me! And that's all right with me!
Oh we will go and worship Pan,
'cause he just don't give a damn!
Grab a woman or a man,
And that's good enough for me!
Was a time, so I've heard tell, a We all worshipped Dionysus
Fine and promising young fella 'Till we ran into a crisis:
Gave his all to serve Cybele The bar had raised its prices;
But that's damn well not for me! That's not good enough for me!
We'll sing praises to Apollo There's that lusty old Priapus
Where the Sun-God leads, I'll follow He's just itching to unwrap us.
From Ionia to Gaul-o (He'd do more to us than tap us
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!)
We will have a mighty Party Pan's pipes got plugged last summer
In the honor of Astarte And it really was a bummer
Grab your chiton - don't be tardy Finally had to call a plumber!
'Cause she's good enough for me! But he's good enough for me!
In his dancing Pan will lead them Now Danae was sweet as flowers,
When his pipes call we will heed them She was into golden showers;
In truth tho, he don't need them And that showed her Zeus' power
He's more than enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Venus We will sing our staves to Venus
She'd have sighed if she'd of seen us We will sing our staves to Venus
Letting morals come between us Tho I think this rhyme is henious
And she's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
There's one thing that I do know Let us dance with Dionysus
Zeus' favorite is Juno And get drunk on wine and spices
She's the best at doing...you know! The Christians call them "vices"
And that's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
It was good enough for Cupid We will venerate old Hermes
It was good enough for Cupid With his staff entwined with wormies
His wings look kind of stupid Warding off the nasty germies
But that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
2323
Let's all drink to Dionysus We will all bow down to Venus
Wine and women beyond prices! As we dance upon Mt. Zenos
He made a Maenad out of my Sis! We will worship with our....voice
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
There are those who, when they've got e-
Normous problems that are knotty
They just take them to Hecate We all worship Aphrodite,
And that's good enough for me! And Her sister bold Astarte,
They both throw a lovely party,
In the church of Aphrodite And that's just fine with me!
She's a mighty righteous sightie,
The Priestess wears a see through nightie
And she's good enough for me
CONFUCIANISM
Let us read works of Confucius We used to study old Confucius
As we walk thru Massachusetts As we sat there on our tushes
In white robes that freeze our tushes We're learning but don't push us
But it's good enough for me! And thats good enough for me
CTHULHU:
We will worship mighty Cthulhu We will worship Great Cthulhu,
H. P. Lovecraft's big old hoodoo We will worship Great Cthulhu,
(1930's fiction voodoo....) And we'll feed him Mr. Sulu
But that's good enough for me! 'Cause that's good enough for me!
Let us sing to Lord Cthuhlu We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
Don't let Lovecraft try to fool you We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
Or the Elder Gods WILL rule you Burn a candle for Yog-Soggoth
And that's good enough for me! And the Goat With a Thousand Young
Of the Old Ones, none is vaster Well it's good enough for *
Even Cthulhu's not his master He's a mighty kinky master
I refer to the unspeakable * When you pray he goes much faster
and that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
And for those who follow Cthulhu Let's go worship Great Cthulhu,
We have really got a lulu: And run naked like a Zulu,
Drop a bomb on Honolulu! You and me and Mr. Sulu,
'Cause that's good enough for you! And that's good enough for me!
* - well, do YOU want to say it?
DISCORDIANISM:
Let us sing to old Discordia Of Great Murphy much is spoken
Cause it's sure she's never bored ya For his Law shall not be broken
And if she's good enough for ya It's not pretty when he's woken
Then she's good enough for me! Things go wrong for you and me!
If your rising sign is Aries If your god of choice is Squat
You'll be taken by the Fairies Well then trendy, man, you're not!
Meet the Buddah in Benares But you'll get a parking spot!
where he'll hit you with a pie! And that's good enough for me!
2324
We will sing a verse for Eris Let us do our thing for Eris
(Golden apples for the fairest!) Goddess of the discord there is
Though she sometimes likes to scare us Apple's golden, it's not ferrous
But she's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Let us praise the Holy Fool
For he's breaking all the rules
Holds you up to ridicule,
And that's good enough for me!
(THE ALMIGHTY) DOLLAR
Oh, the dollar is our Saviour There are those who scream and holler
If we spend Her or we save Her And get hot under the collar
She controls all our behaviour For their god, Almighty Dollar,
There's not enough for me! Who is good enough for me!
Call Him God, or call him Allah
The priest will take your dollah
Easy living from -your- follah-
-wers, but sorry, -not- from me!
DRUIDS:
We will worship like the Druids, In Pwyll's hall you will be welcome
Drinking strange fermented fluids, But he's not at home too often
Running naked through the woo-ids, Spends all his time in Annwyfn
Coz that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
I'll go get my golden sickle
And I'll wear it where it tickles
It ain't used for cuttin' pickles!
And it's good enough for me!
EGYPTIAN:
Let us sing the praise of Horus When we all bowed down to Nuit
As our fathers did before us There was really nothin' to it
We're the New Egyptian Chorus (Alex Sanders made me do it...)
And we sing in harmony! But that's good enough for me!
We will venerate Bubastis We will pray with those Egyptians
We will venerate Bubastis Build pyramids to put our crypts in
If you want in, then just ast us! Cover subways with inscriptions,
'cause that's good enough for me! which is good enough for me.....!
Let us all now worship Ra We will all do praise to Horus
And take care of our Ka In an old Egyptian chorus
We'll all sit round and go "Ah-h-h!" If there's something in it for us
Which is good enough for me! Then it's good enough for me!
Here's an invitation for us We will venerate Bubastis
All to go and worship Horus Cause my cat walked up and ast us
Doff your clothes and join the chorus (Now the cat box is DISASTROUS!)
And that's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
2325
FICTIONAL GODS, DEMONS AMD HEROES:
Here's to those who copy Conan We will sing of Foul the Render,
Here's to those who copy Conan Who's got Drool Rockworm on a bender
They're just Followers of Onan In his cave in Kiril Threndor--
And that's good enough for me! They're both too much for me!
There are followers of Conan. Of Lord Shardik you must beware;
And you'll never hear 'em groanin' To please him you must swear;
Followed Crom up to his throne(in) 'Cause enraged he's a real Bear,
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Azahoth is in his Chaos We will sing of Iluvatur,
Azahoth is in his Chaos Who sent the Valar 'cross the water
Now if only he don't sway us To lead Morgoth to the slaughter
That is good enough for me! And that's just fine with me!
We will worship Holy Ford We will sing the Jug of Issek,
Beta, Delta, Gamma, Lord And of Fafhrd his chief mystic,
But the Alphas might get bored Though to thieving Mouser will stick,
A Brave New World for you and me! And that's good enough for me!
Let us note the might of Ils We'll invoke the blessed Camber
With a thousand or more quills And the Unicorn of Amber
By the light that from him spills And the wizard Deliamber
He is good enough for me! They're good enough for me!
The late return of the Prophet Zarquon It was good enough for Cthulhu
Caused his followers to hearken Who'd eat me and who'd eat you, too;
As the Universe went dark on If it's good enough for Cthulhu
All of you and me! Then it's good enough for me
HINDU:
There are some that call it folly We will go to worship Kali
When we worship Mother Kali. She will help us in our folly
She may not be very jolly She'd be quite an armful, golly!
But she's good enough for me! And she's good enough for me!
As the goddess Kali dances I will wait till four-armed Kali
With her worshippers in trances Drags me thru that lonesome valley
You can learn some Hindu stances She's disgusting act-u-all-y
And that's good enough for me! But She's good enough for me!
ISLAMIC:
We will all bow down to Allah Warriors for Allah
For he gave his loyal follow Are sure to have a gala
Ers the mighty petro-dollah Time in old Valhalla
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
2326
JEWISH:
If you think that you'll be sav-ed Some guys have a circumcision
If you think that you'll be sav-ed On account of their religion,
If you follow Mogen David An embarrassing incision
Then that's good enough for me! Cut just ENOUGH from me!
Let us worship old Jehovah Let us celebrate Jehovah
All you other gods move ovah Who created us "ab ova"
Cause the one God's takin' over He'll be on tonight on "Nova"
And it's good enough for me! 'cause he's good enough for me!
KAHBAHLA:
We will read from the Kabahlah We will read from the Cabala.
We will read from the Kabahlah Quote the Tree of Life mandala
It won't get us to Valhalla It won't get you in Valhalla,
But it's good enough for me! Yet it's good enough for me!
KRISHNA:
We will all sing Hare Krishna Hare Krishna gets a laugh on
We will all sing Hare Krishna When he sees me dressed in saffron
It's not mentioned in the Mishna With my hair that's only half on
But it's good enough for me! But that's good enough for me!
I was singing Hari Rama
With my friend the Dalai Lama
'Til they dumped us in the slammer
But that's good enough for me!
MIDDLE EASTERN PAGAN:
I'll sing some songs to Lilith, We will have a mighty orgy
Not so young, and not so girlish, in the honour of Astarte
and She's always PMS-ish, it'll be a mighty party
but She's good enough for me! and it's good enough for me!
Lilith wears a lacy nightie We will sing to Lady Isis
And She is a little flighty She'll stand by us in a crisis
She will get you all excite-y And She hasn't raised Her prices
She's wet-dream enough for me! And She's good enough for me!
We will all bow down to Dagon We will all bow down to Enlil
We will all bow down to Dagon We will all bow down to Enlil
He still votes for Ronald Reagan Pass your Cup and get a refill!
And that's good enough for me! With bold Gilgamesh the Brave!
Let us worship sweet Eninni Oh the ancient goddess Nerthus
Let us worship sweet Eninni From herself the Earth did birth us
In a skimpy string bikini And I wonder: are we worth us?
And that's good enough for me! But she's good enough for me!
We will go to worship Lillith Well Dimuzi's on vacation
Grab your cup, step up and fill it He'll be back when spring awakens
Tho 'ware she don't make you spill it! There will be such recreation
And that's good enough for me! There will be enough for me!
2327
Oh the Phillistines abound
Oh the Phillistines abound
They had the biggest Baals around
And that's good enough for me!
MITHRAISM:
We will sing a song of Mithras We will all be saved by Mithras
Let us sing a song of Mithras We will all be saved by Mithras
But there is no rhyme for Mithras! Slay the Bull and play the zithras
Still he's good enough for me! On that Resurrection Day!
MOONIES
We will worship Sun Myung Moonie
Though we know he is a goonie
All our money he'll have soonly
And that's good enough for me!
NEW AGE:
Oh, our Spirits will awaken Well I'm tired of Ronald Reagan,
Oh, our Spirits will awaken He's too square to be a pagan,
Watch the Universe a-quakin' Let's all vote for Carl Sagan!
Which is Gurdijeff to me! He's good enough for me!
Timmy Leary we will sing to I'll arise at early mornin'
And the things that he was into When the Sun gives me the warnin'
(Well, at least it wasn't Shinto) That the Solar Age is dawnin'
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
In the sky I hear a hummin' Just like Carlos Castenada
It's the UFO's a-comin' Just like Carlos Castenada
That's not banjos that they're strummin It'll get you sooner or later
But it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
NEW WORLD PAGAN:
Thanks to great Quetzacoatl Some folks pray to the Great Spirit
And his sacred axolotl Most folks just cannot get near it
And his gift of chocolatl So they hate it and they fear it
And please pass some down to me! But it's good enough for me!
Praise to Popacatapetl Some folks worship the Kachinas
Just a tiny cigarette'll Some folks worship the Kachinas
Put him in terrific fettle They look like "deus ex machinas"
So he's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
Now watch out for the Maya's, Montezuma liked to start out
They might really try to fry ya, Rites by carrying a part out
Sacrifice people, not papaya's, That would really tear your heart out,
Just as long as its not me! But it's good enough for me!
Quetzacoatl's flyin' And when old Quetzacoatl
With the Toltec and the Mayan Found a virgin he could throttle
And the mushrooms he's been buyin' And put her heart into a bottle
Are good enough for me! It was good enough for me.
2328
We will worship Xochipilli We will worship Xipe-Totec
Though it might be a bit silly Tho it is a little lo-tek *
Running naked makes me chilly It is not a bit ero-tek (erotic)
But it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
* "low - tech(nology)
Oh, there's none like Huizlipochtli The Kachinas of the Hopi
For destroyin' people tot'ly Dance about and some act dopey
Best to worship -him- remotely! They don't leave you feelin' mopey
But he's good enough for me! So they're good enough for me!
I have gotten in the way-o
Walkin' with the Monster Slayer
He is worthy of a prayer
And he's good enough for me!
SCIENTOLOGY
L. Ron Hubbard liked precision In matters Dianetic
And he founded a religion You need not get frenetic
That has caught a lot of pigeons Make your Engrams copacetic
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
SHINTO:
There are some who practice Shinto I don't really go for Shinto
There are some who practice Shinto It's just something I'm not into
There's no telling what WE'RE into! Tho I guess I could begin to
but that's good enough for me! 'Cause it's good enough for me!
In Japan they thought it neato
When they worshipped Hirohito
But that didn't sit with SEATO
So it never more will be!
THELEMA:
Uncle Crowley was a dreamer When the clouds they are a'rumbling
At the Abbey of Thelemer And the thunder is a'grumbling
But his magic is a screamer, Then it's Crowley that you're mumbling
So it's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
There are those who follow Crowley Let us call an Elemental
Tho the stuff that he held holy For a temporary rental
Turn your your brain to guacamole Just as long as it is gentle
But he's good enough for me! It is good enough for me!
It was good enough for Crowley
With his sacraments unholy
Who smoked pot and ate some moly
And it's good enough for me!
VOODOO:
There are people into voodoo There are people into Voodoo
Africa has raised a hoodoo There are people into Voodoo
Just one little doll will do you I know I do, I hope you do!
And it's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
2329
If you're really into dancing
And you wanna try some trancing
Then the Voodoo gods are prancing
And that's good enough for me!
WICCA AND GENERAL NEO-PAGAN:
Well, she raised an awful flurry When old Gerald got it goin'
When she made the scholars worry When old Gerald got it goin'
Thank the Gods for Margaret Murray! All that hidin' turned to showin'
She is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Granny It's not good enough for Reagan
She could throw a double-whammy It's not good enough for Reagan
That would knock you on your fanny He's too square to be a Pagan!
And she's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
With the aid of my athame Meeting at the Witching Hour
I can throw a "double-whammy" By the Bud, and Branch and Flower
(And can slice and dice salami!) Folks are raising up the Power
So it's good enough for me! And that's where I want to be!
There will be a lot of lovin' We will worship with the witches
When we're meetin in our Coven 'Cause we're rowdy sons-of-bitches
Quit yer pushin and yer shovin' And they scratch us where it itches
So there's room enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Well the Christians all are humming We will gather at our saunas
Cause they say their God is coming, When the spirit comes upon us
Our God came three times this evening To perform the Rites of Faunus
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Some folks worship all of Nature
Tho they love to taunt and bait-cher
They're just funnin', they don't hate-cher
And they're good enough for me!
ZARATHUSTRIAN:
We will pray to Zarathustra It could be that you're a Parsi
And we'll pray just like we usta It could be that you're a Parsi
I'm a Zarathustra boosta! Don't need a ticket; you get in free
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
I pray to Ahura-Mazda I can't rhyme Ahura Mazda,
He's one god who sure won't pause ta I'll praise the man who tries ta
Pound some heads when given cause ta Then I'll wait for Barak Raz ta
Which is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
UNCLASSIFIABLE VERSES AND UNKNOWN GHODS:
We will go down to the temple There are those who worship no gods
Sit on mats woven of hemp-le For they think that there are low odds
Try to set a good "exemple" That the god-seers aren't drunk sods
And that's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
Let us watch Ka-ka-pa-ull Where's the gong gone? I can't find it
Frolic in her swimming pool I think Northwoods is behind it!
Subjecting chaos to her rule For they've always been cymbal-minded
And that's all right with me! And they're good enough for me!
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They revered ancient ENIAC Some folks pray to the Orishas
And sacrificed to UNIVAC Tho their humor can be vishas
Now we sing our chants on VAX pack When they grant your stupid wishas
And that's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
When you worship Rusto There are those who worship science
Treat your friends with lust-o And some would send 'em to the lions
Pursue your faith with gusto! Without 'em we'd have no appliance
And that's good enough for me! So they're good enough for me
We will all bow down to Gozer
Priestess did it with that Joser
Cross the streams, and there she goes, sir
And that's good enough for me!
We will worship Christian Jesus Drink to FUFLUNS he's just fine
And do just like John Paul pleases The Etruscan god of wine
That we will... when Hades freezes! This verse doesn't really rhyme
And that's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
I have got a strange religion John, Paul, George and Ringo
I will worship Walter Pidgeon We will worship playing Bingo
Is he sacred? Just a smidgen! We will listen to them sing-o
But it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
THE OBLIGATORY LAST VERSE
It's the opera written for us!
We will all join in the chorus!
It's the opera about Boris,
Which is Godunov for me!
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I suppose that this last song has turned you into a newt by now.
You may not realize that it happened, 'cause that's just how that
sort of thing seems to work. You need to put a carrot on your nose
and find a duck, and weigh it. Then you'll be OK again.
*
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