Chapter 11

Chakras and Relationships

 Introduction

Because our chakras continually receive and send out energy, we are continually being affected by and affecting others, sometimes in positive ways, sometimes not. No wonder some people want to be hermits.
If your energies are strong, you will have an immediate impact upon anyone who comes into your presence. Specifically what kind of impact will depend on the condition of the other person's energy system. Someone who has weak energies or is not feeling well may be intimidated, overwhelmed or wiped out in your presence; that person also could be energized by you. If the other person also has strong energies, there is likely to be better balance and a better rapport-a feeling of being equal.
We experience energy primarily through our most open chakras. If your sexual chakra is the most open, then regardless of what you receive from others, you will experience it on the sexual level. Not only that, but the other person's energy will primarily go out the sexual level. If your heart chakra is the most open, you tend to experience life as love.
Energy received by overly open spleen or navel chakras will cause emotional reactions. Some people receive most energy through their third or fifth eye; they deal with the world primarily on a mental level. The unexpected reactions of others are due to this chakra "snagging" process; more on this later. The reverse also true; you receive strong energies from others through your strongest chakra. When you become aware of a strong reaction to another per�son but do not understand that reaction, seek to know the area or chakra of your body where you feel this energy most strongly. If you think your energy response is inappropriate, consciously move the energy to a different chakra area (such as the heart or brow).
When you become aware that your energies are too intense for comfort, stretch your body and breathe deeply. This breaks up the stress pattern and increases energy flow. Another way to achieve balance is to send energy out your feet and the top of your head. Dancing equalizes energy throughout the body and is therefore a good release when you feel pent up or blocked; it can also be used as a preparation for meditation or intense mental work.

Energy Ties
People who have strong mutual feelings establish energy ties which bind them even when they are not physically together. The bind may be at the heart, brow, navel, or sexual chakras, or combina�tions of the chakras. Those who are very sensitive to these energies can feel them and the clairvoyant can see them. Two people who care deeply for one another but ignore each other when in the com�pany of others might suppose they are hiding their connection; still, the bond between them can be felt or psychically seen.
When one person of a married couple starts sending energy to a third person, his or her mate may notice something is missing, suspect an affair is brewing, or feel a sense of loss and not know why. The reason is the diminished flow in the couple's energy connection.
In marriage or close friendships a strong tie can be very benefi�cial and comforting. When there are connections at all chakra levels, the partners have a feeling of blending and really fitting together. Relationships with an easy flow and strong contacts have a stronger chance of lasting. But intensity can be overwhelming. Too strong a tie may represent a loss of individuality. Sometimes one person takes on characteristics of the other. This is one reason we should be careful with whom we have our deepest contact.
Sometimes a parent will feel closer to or love one child more than another. This may stem from a strong past life connection, or may be due to chakra energy rapport in this life. Even when the par�ent tries to treat all the children alike, the other siblings usually sense who receives the most energy attention. They may insist the parent likes the other child better when actually there is only a stronger connection. Such connections can and do change during lifetimes. Negative feelings between people often manifest in a ha�tred connection between their spleen or navel chakras.

Exercise. Close your eyes. With whom do you have psychic ties? Are they negative or positive? Where do you feel them in your chakras? What are your ties with the other person's chakras? Do these ties drain or reinforce you?

Charisma and High Energy People
Charismatic people have strong energy fields which they can use in positive or negative ways. Have you ever listened to a speaker whom you thoroughly enjoyed only to wonder later how you could have agreed with the person's ideas? You were under the speaker's "spell," feeling a charismatic energy while in his or her presence. Great speakers can send the essence of their message through their energy and really touch their audiences, sometimes inspiring them. Great actresses and actors do the same thing. So do con artists. A charismatic person has the ability to send energies from different chakras which can snag the chakras of others.
Sometimes you will find that other people literally blow your mind with their forceful energies. You may be at a loss to answer the person, think clearly or verbalize your thoughts. You feel defense�less. This type of person usually sends very strong energies from the third eye (between the eyebrows) or the fifth eye (in the center of the forehead). If you find this happening to you, send energy out either your third or fifth eye, whichever seems appropriate, and let it meet the other person's half way; you will keep your thought patterns from getting messed up. If you find it difficult to follow or compre�hend a speaker, send energy gently out your fifth eye.
Some charismatic people are so filled with love and peace that they seem single-handedly to change the vibrations everywhere they go. Just being in their presence others can experience the ele�vating effect of their energies.

Chakra Snagging
Another's strong energy flow from a particular chakra may snag you in that same chakra. Being with someone who is very irritable and upset may snag you; you become irritable and upset yourself. You may wish to send peace from your navel chakra to counteract the other person's energies. You may also find that concentrating on a higher chakra will help to balance things.
We all have to be careful of being snagged, careful too of what we send to others. One person in a crabby mood can set off everyone else, whether at home or work. Co-workers often leave a negative situation only to go elsewhere and complain about it, unaware they got snagged with the negativity and are spreading it. A wonderful gift you can give to other people is to let them have their space and not get caught in their moods or acting as if you caused them; likewise, you can feel your own moods without feeling compelled to snag others into it.
Children, especially, can snag their parents with their negative thoughts and emotions. Adults may give children their own way or totally shut them out as ways of getting them to stop snagging the chakras. Living together creates a situation where all people in a group tend to block or open the same chakras. children pick up many of their parents' attitudes and feelings, even on a subliminal level, getting clues that certain chakras should be closed or open at certain times; without anyone's realizing it, the child takes on the parents' ways of relating to the world.
Every thought and feeling you have about another person becomes an energy form which goes to that person. It affects the person on some level. Do remember that anything you send out eventually returns to you. You get what you give.
If you feel inundated with thoughts and feelings from others, imagine yourself surrounded with a psychic ultraviolet light. If the feelings or thoughts get stronger, they are yours; if they fade away, they are someone else's. You may even be aware of the person sending them or see his or her face. The person probably does not mean any harm. There are many careless thoughts and feelings which pollute our air.

Do Unto Others
When you want someone to have certain energies, such as confidence or peace, feel that in your energies and usually it will reflect in the other person. Sometimes you may be angry over another's lack of calm or peace, but this only makes matters worse.

Clarity
Feeling what you are thinking or saying helps you be aware of what you really mean. It also helps convey the essence of your message and you will be more easily understood.

Sappers
People with low levels of energy may unconsciously drain or sap energy from others. Such people have not learned to absorb energy from the surrounding air, instead pulling it predigested from another person; or they are so emotionally disturbed or physically weak as not to be able to pull energy in for themselves. "Predigested" means that the energy has already been brought in by another person and transformed to a usable frequency; it is an easy way out.
People who for no apparent reason make you feel drained or irritable are sapping your energy. Energy pulled from you leaves you weakened. You may feel your aura shutting down. When this happens, your energy comes back toward you and your body tightens. You may look for excuses to get away from the sappers. When you have gotten away and your energy truly becomes yours again, you may wonder why you acted as you did . Were you uncaring or too hasty? Should you have stayed? Guilt feelings may ensue, which an awareness of this sapping dynamic may help you understand.
Feeling drained, you may wish to become aware of the chakra or chakras from which energy is being pulled. You can then make the choice either to close the chakra or send energy to the other person. Sharing energy is a gift, and what you give strengthens you. But when the person to whom you send energy does not relax and come into strength, you may need to stop sending energy. Sometimes people become dependent on others' energies. When you choose not to send energy, seek protection by filling and surrounding yourself with a white light, consciously willing your own aura to be stronger and creating a force-field against draining influences. Another procedure is that of imagining a glass wall between you and the sapper.

Those Who Stir It Up  
A person with highly charged or unbalanced chakras may seek stimulating conditions, such as arguments, which aid the release of these excess energies. Some people are happier when they have caused a commotion. Their needling and fight-starting may stimulate their own energy and release blocks, but neither does much for the other person. Gossip, heavily judgmental, is another form of stir-it-up release. In the company of someone who is trying to stir it UP, try to remain peaceful and not get snagged. You may need to change the subject or ask the person not to talk meanly of others in your presence.

Sex  
Preoccupation with sexual thoughts or feelings may stem from excessively opened sexual chakras. Whether or not a person in this situation is aware of it, others pick up the sexual energies, perhaps even to the point of supposing interest in a sexual encounter. This can be confusing. Make sure in this situation that your own sexual chakras are balanced or your higher chakras are open; you will be less inclined to take things personally.  
Sometimes people with very high spiritual energies and blocked sexual energies will attract people with blocked spiritual energies and high sexual energies. It is an attraction of opposites; but we are also dealing with higher and lower octaves of the same energy and it may be that one person's very spiritual energies attract sexual responses from another. Seek protection by filling and surrounding yourself with a radiant light and feeling balance all over your body. Relationships and sex are best when all chakras are balanced, open and flowing well.

Blocking  
We spend a great portion of our lives in relationships, surrounded by the energy others are sending out. It is important both how we receive others' energies and how our own energies are received by others. In the company of someone whose chakras are blocked, you may feel shut out, as if that person wants nothing to do with you. This may not be the case at all- The person may very much want interaction but is so used to having blocked chakras that to open them in your company is a frightening proposition; relationships in this situation can be scary and tense  
When you want to be more open, feel your chakras as relaxed, open, and receptive to others' energies. There are some very positive benefits to openness: a sense of connection, strength, cuddliness, or of not being alone in the world. When you want others to be more receptive of you, let your energies out in a peaceful way. Do not force them or the person receiving them may feel bombarded.

Better Understanding Your Chakras: An Exercise  
 Close your eyes. Imagine that a significant person in your fife is standing in front of you or near you. Be aware how your body reacts to this presence. Which chakras open or close? You will feel relaxed where they are open and tight where they are closed. More aware of the movement of your own energies, you will be able to have more control and enjoyment in life. Remember that energy patterns change according to the situation and the people you are with.

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